Everyone knows that by sharing our goals with a person we trust we hope to get some form of acknowledgement and emotional support (or, at least a nod). What more, if we tell the public about it and the whole crowd gave a standing ovation (confirm, we feel like a champion already).
But, it's a bad idea actually. An idea that will backfire.
It's like some sort of coping or survival mechanism we have in us that makes us feel like "Okay, if people I trust say that I'm on the right path, means I am on the right path" and if they belittle our idea, we feel as if it is some form of eternal and holy condemnation that will put us in the path of regret and torment.
Telling People Your Goals Can Backfire
I hope you guys already know this, but even after I know this, I still feel like there is a grey area in this study somewhere.
Telling people what you want to achieve creates a premature sense of completeness.
And this statement is backed by research which I couldn't find the original source (urgh). BUT, nontheless..there are tons of articles out there writing about this finding that I feel it is surprising and absurd.
It's as if this research is trying to stop people from sharing what matters to us with people we care! How could that be something positive!?
Imagine, keeping secrets from your mum and dad all your life because you don't want to disappoint them?
Ok..Maybe It Is True, A Little bit..
What the research had found is that people who announced their goals to others, whether friends or the public, realized that they did not achieve their stated goals at all.
While the people who kept their goals a secret and work on their craft quietly managed to achieve their goals.
Okaay..okaaay. I have to admit, there were a few goals in my life that I shared with a lot of people especially to my colleagues, friends, family, and, you know what?, I did not achieve those goals. (Meh).
Well, that's because they were the one who asked. Even so, I was very reluctant to share my goals with anyone in fear that they will laugh at them because big dreams always sound like a joke, right?
But here's the thing....few years later after I shared all those dreams of mine, I'm still nowhere near my goals!
I remembered telling people that:
Is it a coincidence or it's exactly what the research has proven?
BUT!..I Did Receive Prayers and Support!
Even though I've met more failures than success, I still had A LOOOT of support.
My family supported me so much in terms of finances when things were bad, they were there when I had to stay up late to study and do work, and they kept praying for me.
My friends who were with me in the business planning, never gave up on my growth and did everything in their own ways and capabilities to support me.
Even if I have failed..I still gained a lot of love and learning experiences. OKLAH..and some profits too that I spent on holidays and food.
What do you think?
In the end, I'm not sure myself. To me, it's better to keep our ideas and goals a secret unless people ask about it.
I think, we should only share our work if we intend to get support or sponsors from trustable people.
We should always be focusing on the work and process, and not get addicted to the feeling of pre-accomplishment when we tell others about our goals, even if it does feel great to be acknowledged as someone who is pursuing a big dream.
So, don't tell people? Tell people? In the end, it's up to us to be discipline and focus and also whether we are fated to achieve such goals.
GUYS!..I WANNA BE THE NEXT UNDER 40 MILLIONAIRE!..but have to wait for airport to reopen so can go to Indonesia and feel like I already am!....HAH.
Zaid Omar is the founder and writer of this blog.. He is someone who values being the best version of himself with regards to his Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual aspects.